Ninja Kids!!! (Review)

Ninja Kids!!!

Ninja Kids!!! (Nintama Rantarô) (2011)

Directed by Takashi Miike

[part of the NYAFF 2011, WORLD PREMIERE]

Keeping up with all the films Takashi Miike makes is like a full time job. I just haven't had time to watch his recent flicks. I've got The Great Yokai War sitting on my computer, I passed up multiple chances to see Miike's latest film 13 Assassins and for some unknown reason I keep figuring I'll checkout Yatterman eventually.

So I decided I wouldn't let Ninja Kids!!! World Premiere at the NYAFF pass me by. The film isn't even out in Japan yet! So I was one of the lucky people last weekend who would be the first to see Miike's latest flick. Miike's been all kinds of serious with his samurai movies (13 Assassins and Hara-Kiri: Death of a Samurai are critically acclaimed soon to be masterpieces). But I was itching to see vintage weirdo Miike. Where was my Ichi/Happiness of the Katakuris/Zebraman/Dead or Alive Miike? Well it seems he was saving all his WTF crazy and put it all into Ninja Kids.

Ninja Kids is like Spy Kids on acid. Think Harry Potter but with over the top ninjas and slapstick comedy. It's a cute Japanese family film with a Miike insanity mixed in. And it works from start to finish. It's super duper funny, has some dog poop humor and a ton of CGI madness that only Miike could think up. Based on a long running Japanese TV show called Rantaro the Ninja Boy, it's filled with humor that's international in the LOLs. It's got visual wackiness, self aware parodies and villains that are basically clowns with swords and ninja stars.

What you get is a family comedy that leaves you feeling freakin awesome after you leave the theater. Ninja Kids is heartwarming Japanese wackiness, the Miike way.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

Exchanging noble samurai for kid ninjas has let Miike get back in touch with his wild side. This big budget, big screen version of popular Japanese kid’s show Rantaro the Ninja Boy (running for 1,437 episodes and counting!) this is like Harry Potter if Harry Potter was a ninja who hid underground and killed people with bamboo darts and ninja bombs.

Young Rantaro is from a family of low class ninjas and he’s sent off to first grade at Ninja School by his parents who hope that one day he’ll grow up to be a respectable middle class ninja. But he’s hardly at school for five minutes when a classmate – literally – has the snot beaten out of him, the headmaster starts exploding and more wild and wooly ninja tricks than you can hit with a throwing star are zipping off the screen.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

Seishirô Katô is a popular child actor in Japan. In Ninja Kids!!! he plays Rantaro, who goes off to Ninja School so that he can fulfull his parents wishes of becoming a great ninja instead of a "low class ninja". Here he meets his classmates who range from a sleepy kid with snotty nose to a soon to be gun marksman to an orphan who brings his babysitting work to class!

Suffice it to say, they go to each class and learn the ways of the ninja. From ninja stars to climbing to explosives, it's all in a school day when training to be a master ninja. They are taught by Mr. Doi, their sensei and a dean of students who has a knack of dodging ninja stars and landing in dog poop.

Rantaro has some Ferris Bueller qualities. He breaks the 4th wall and talks to the audience. The film is totally self aware. In the middle of battles a mysterious disfigured ninja breaks through the setting literally and explains a particular weapon. It's completely WTF and it's just plain super awesome. Ninja Kids is full of other wacky moments and you never know what you'll see next.

As Rantaro and his fellow 1st graders learn from their masters, they also start observing the other grades. 2nd to 5th are all represented and are getting quite good at their art. From the art of deception to explosives to booby trapping and also plain old kicking ass, the ninja academy is quite the student body.

Well eventually we get a plot which to say the least isn't the best in the world. From what I can gather, some other ninja clans are out to kill friends of Mr. Doi. This leads to some assassination attempts that are foiled by the students. In the final scenes, the masters enact a contest where the evil ninja clan must race with the 1st graders to ring a bell on top of a mountain. It's a hilarious conclusion where Grades 1-5 outsmart their not so smart and hideous looking henchmen ninjas in a variety of ways. Along the way we're treated to various WTF moments that could only come from across the Pacific on those islands of Japan.

The humor is top notch, never losing anything in translation. All the jokes hit the mark and others well they hit the outer rings. When our bad guys get pounded, we see bright red ping pong balls on their head which represent their "lumps" in a cartooney way. Sure, not all the jokes work but Miike has a way of figuring out what Japanese and Western audiences will find funny and when somebody falls in a hole with his bomb, that's just universally cartoon funny.

Ninja Kids!!! is a Japanese family film I'd take my 10 year old and 6 year old nephews too. I saw a lot of kids in the audience and people of all ages. The crowd was laughing in pure ecstasy from all the visual gags and one liners that were relentlessly onscreen.

Sure I'll be catching up on all my Miike films eventually. I hear 13 Assassins has a insane hour long battle scene and Yatterman is also an live action anime filled with craziness. I prefer my Miike with a side of WTF and a steaming cup of cuteness. Takashi Miike is sort of like the Robert Rodriguez of Japan. Rodriguez will follow up a grindhouse masterpiece like Machete with Spy Kids 4. The only difference is Miike makes more films in a year than R.R. does in 3.

And his kid's flicks are just plain better.

Gore-ipedia

Cartooney violence without the anvils

WTF moment

Snot kid's snot is elastic

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

NYAFF 2011 film festival opens on 7/1. I've created a list of films to check out at this year's festival. You can catch Ninja Kids world premiere on Saturday July 9th at 6pm at Japan Society (333 East 47th St)

Head over to the official site for more info.

I'm going to give this 3 and a half spinkicks. I'm only knocking half a spinkick because the plot was a little too goofy for my taste. Also, there were a few moments of musical flashbacks that didn't click for me and weren't that funny. Maybe something lost in translation?

The Vitals

• The official site via NYAFF 2011

Rating:
1/2

Check out the trailer.





Teaser trailer with English subs!

NYAFF 2011: Top Movies to Check Out

Summer is upon us and I know you want to head outdoors and enjoy the sun and the grass but starting next month you may want to head indoors to see some awesome Asian flicks courtesy of the New York Asian Film Festival.

They've just released their schedule and it's packed full of choice flicks from love stories to horror flicks to plain old crazy WTF films. Check out the full schedule. Also head over to the official site for more info.

I've perused the list and here are the top flicks that you really need to check out. I haven't seen them all but I've been itching to see the one's below. There are plenty of other flicks on the schedule, so be sure to check out all of them.

Ticket prices this year will be:

• $13 general / $9 students & seniors / $8 members for Lincoln Center
• $12 general / $9 members, students & seniors for Japan Society
• Japan Society will be running a special “buy 5, save $2 off each ticket” deal (in-person or telephone purchases only).
• Lincoln Center will again offer their Ten Film Pass for $99 general / $79 students & seniors / $69 members.

CHINA

BUDDHA MOUNTAIN (China, 2010, North American Premiere, 105 minutes) - gobbling up festival awards around the world, Sylvia Chang stars as a suicidal landlady who rents an apartment to three irritating young hipsters in this transcendent drama from Li Yu (LOST IN BEIJING) one of the only female directors working in China. Popular actress, Fan Bingbing (SHAOLIN), stars as one of the hipsters, but it¹s Sylvia Chang, the most important woman in Chinese show business in the 70¹s and 80¹s, who owns this movie.

PUNISHED (Hong Kong, 2011, International Premiere, 94 minutes) - the latest movie produced by Johnnie To, this is a hardcore revenge drama featuring a powerhouse turn by Anthony Wong as a real estate billonaire whose wild child daughter has been kidnapped. Bullet-to-the-head action the way Hong Kong used to do it.

RIKI-OH: THE STORY OF RICKY (Hong Kong, 1991, 91 minutes) - the classic HongKong midnight action movie about prison privatization and monsters who strangle you with their guts. Rarely seen on the big screen, this is a full-on, ridiculously crazy mind-melter full of crucifixion, flaying, classic kung fu combat and prison wardens who keep breath mints in their glass eyeballs.

JAPAN

13 ASSASSINS: DIRECTOR'S CUT (Japan, 2010, 141 minutes, New York Premiere) -
the complete UNCUT version of Takashi Miike¹s samurai masterpiece. With 17 minutes of original footage restored.
***One of the movie¹s stars, Takayuki Yamada, will be at the screening

BATTLE ROYALE (Japan, 2000, 114 minutes) - a celebratory screening of Kinji Fukasaku¹s masterpiece now that it finally - after 10 years!!!! - has a new distributor who wants people to actually see it. Presented with Japan Cuts: Festival of Contemporary Japanese Cinema

KARATE-ROBO ZABORGAR (Japan, 2011, New York Premiere, 106 minutes) ­ Noboru
Iguchi (Robo Geisha) makes his best film yet. Not just that, but this is the best-looking flick from label, Sushi Typhoon, yet. Slick, big budget and almost family friendly, it¹s based on an obscure TV show from the 70¹s about a young, bright-eyed police officer and his karate robot (who transforms into a motorcycle) fighting crime. But in Iguchi¹s version, the two split up and have to reunite years later after middle-age has taken its toll.

NINJA KIDS!!! (Japan, 2011, World Premiere, 100 minutes) -
Centerpiece Presentation. Takashi Miike's latest flick.

Presented with Japan Cuts: Festival of Contemporary Japanese Cinema

VERSUS (Japan, 2000, 120 minutes) - a tenth-anniversary celebration of the Japanese zombie action film that launched a thousand horror/splatter/action flicks.
***Star and action choreographer, Tak Sakaguchi, and writer, Yudai
Yamaguchi, will be at the screening.

YAKUZA WEAPON (Japan, 2011, New York Premiere, 105 minutes) - stuntman-turned-director, Tak Sakaguchi, turns in a high calibre, action-heavy riff on Robocop all about a robot yakuza out to put his fist through the skulls of the bad guys. From Sushi Typhoon, purveyor of movies like Alien vs. Ninja.
***The movie¹s director and star, Tak Sakaguchi, and co-director and writer,
Yudai Yamaguchi, will be at the screening

Presented with Japan Cuts: Festival of Contemporary Japanese Cinema

KOREA

BEDEVILLED (Korea, 2010, New York Premiere, 115 minutes) - part of Sea of
Revenge focus.

PHILIPPINES

MACHETE MAIDENS UNLEASHED (Australia, 2010, New York Premiere, 84 minutes) -
from the people who made Not Quite Hollywood, comes this definitive documentary about the Filipino exploitation film bonanza that erupted in the 70s and 80s.

CHECK OUT THE JADED VIEWER'S REVIEW OF MACHETE MAIDENS UNLEASHED!

THAILAND

BKO: BANGKOK KNOCKOUT (Thailand, 2010, New York Premiere, 105 minutes) -
Tony Jaa¹s mentor, Panna Rittikrai, will school you now. This exploitation stunt-tacular features all his best stuntmen and women unleashing muay thai, capoeira, dirt bike fu, shovel beatdowns, fights on fire, fights in the water, fights under trucks, fights in mid-air, and two back-to-back
climactic smackdowns that have to be seen to be believed.

CHECK OUT THE JADED VIEWER'S REVIEW OF BKO: BANGKOK KNOCKOUT!

***********************************************

Ninja Kids and Machete Maidens Unleashed are my top priority. Once I check em out, you'll see my reviews here starting next week.

Are you psyched yet?

Then check out the trailer.

Psychological Mastermind: Takashi Miike

[this feature is brought to you by guest writer Camiele White, and no she's not an intern. The Jaded Viewer is to poor to have interns.]

Psychological Mastermind: Takashi Miike

Who would ever imagine that there could be beauty in the mind of a psychopath? If there is such a thing, it’s most certainly found in the imagination of Takashi Miike. He has the eye of a painter with the mind of a serial killer --bloody guts and gore with an uncanny bit of grace.

Coming from a working class area in Yao, Osaka, Japan, Miike had a very normal upbringing. His father was a welder and his mother, a seamstress. He graduated from the Yokohama Vocational School of Broadcast and Film, under the tutelage of one of the most celebrated directors in Japan, Shōhei Imamura. With technical knowledge and an eye on the boundaries of the film industry, Miike shook up the world with some of the most shocking, lurid, creepy, and over the top work to come out of Japan.

Though he’s never been one to toot his own horn, it’s plain to see that Miike is an artist of gore and black comedy. Though his work takes a particular taste, you can’t deny that his work leaves the world in awe at every single turn. At his most shocking, he doesn’t allow you to settle. The nerves are always dangling by fingernails on the edge of the proverbial cliff and just when you think he’s going to step on your fingers and watch you fall to the rocks below in a lump of blood and brain matter, he reaches out his hand and pulls you back just long enough for you to take a few gulps of clean air before being shoved right back over.

Some of the most beautiful films to come out of the early 2000s seemed to come from the chainsaw of Miike. Well, I suppose I’m biased. The first taste I got of Miike was from his infamous film, Audition. One of those films worthy of cult status. I think the first time I actually watched the film I couldn’t believe how disgustingly gorgeous it was. Miike knows just what to expose to get you involved in the film. And just when you’ve found yourself caring about the characters in a way that’s too close for comfort, he slaps you in the face. No, fuck that! He straight up molly-wops you in the skull! It’s the kind of film that could catch you so off guard that it keeps you awake at night for months afterwards --maybe not out of fear; more out of a constant throbbing feeling of unease that just when you think everything’s beautiful, something’s going to sneak up behind you and kick you in the arse.

I think that’s what’s so brilliant about the psychotic brain matter of Takashi Miike. Yes, he’s all about the blood and gratuitous sexual perversity. However, for someone who delves deep into the human flesh, he sure knows how to make it gorgeous! I think the most touching aspect of Miike’s style is that he has the eye of a photographer and the hand of a gifted painter --he sees the beauty, but doesn’t force it. It may seem like he squeezes ever drop of weirdness possible out of every scene, but he has an exceptional eye for sensitivity. There’s a reason why Audition has been described as a “romantic horror”. That’s the kind of contradiction that Miike works with --perhaps romance and horror aren’t so different?

In Ichi the Killer, you’re not simply dealing with a killing machine whose only real goal is to destroy the ruthless Kuchisaki-oona faced Yakuza maniac, Kakihara. It’s the story of an orphan named Ichi who’s been brainwashed from childhood with the idea that he’s nothing without his natural urge to kill. There’s a depth and a care taken with each character. That’s the brilliance of Miike --the audience gets so close to each character (even those who seem to be the most gruesome) that at you can’t help but get involved in their stories. And at the crucial moment of intimacy between the audience and the characters, there’s a feeling like being pushed in front of an oncoming diesel train. Scenes of complex emotional thickness between Ichi and anyone he encounters are followed by unethically violent scenes of torture and violence (the slitting of a woman’s nipples, a man’s face cut clean from his skull and splattered across a blood-soaked wall).

It’s this push and pull that is indicative of the range and imagination to make some of the most entertaining children’s films (Zebraman and The Great Yokai War) and the most touching and intellectually complex films (Sabu and The Bird People in China). Miike’s desire to delve deeper than what the mind initially wants to tackle is what sets him apart in the film industry among an elite few that manage to teach as well as repulse. He pushes the boundaries of violence, sexuality, and intellect to a pulsating breaking point.

I don’t think I’ve ever been so repulsed and so educate about raw and unapologetic beauty than with Miike. He’s a master that is, surprisingly, underrated in the film industry. Those close to film tout him as a genius. Those just meeting him for the first time are driven crazy to the point of murder. Whichever side of the saucer you spill, there’s no way that you can avoid being affected by the psychological mastermind that is Takashi Miike.

There is pure beauty in everything. I have a keen interest in all things that shed light and colour in this dark and, at times, uninspiring world. I love film, all film --ranging from Japanese and Korean horror, to nonsensical action films. The one qualification is that it must, must entertain me. As much as I love watching film, I love even more to write about it.

Right now, I get my jabberjaw jollies writing about Halloween costumes. If you want to give me a buzz, I can be reached at cmlewhite at gmail [dot] com.

Insano Steve’s One Sentence Reviews-O-Matic (Japanese Militant Edition)

I'm introducing a new feature. This one is Insano Steve's one sentence review o matics. I tasked Insano Steve to review every movie in his DVD collection but instead he gave one sentence reviews (lazy bastard).

They're still hilarious when broken down into different editions. This will definitely be a reoccuring segement on the jaded viewer. This week's edition: Japanese Militant Edition! Enjoy.

• Kichiku - Militant Japanese students fuck and kill each other. yes, in that order, you sicko. has some graphic hari kari scenes! very underrated.
• Fudoh: The New Generation - a girl shoots poison darts out of her vagina. otherwise, it's the usual Miike manga inspired madness
• Female Convict Scorpion: Jailhouse 41 - Japanese grindhouse movie. a female in prison escapes to kill again. features random stabbings in Tokyo streets. awesome movie!
• Battle Royale series - part 1 was great. part 2 sucked. the idea's been copied to death. i own both movies....on vcd!
• Female Inquisitor - a Japanese "interrogation company" uses rape and torture to acquire sensitive information from targets. with all parties involved having big breasts.
  

Audition (Review)

Directed by Takashi Miike

Insano Steve says: Old widower decides he'd like to remarry now in his old age and has his friend (a movie producer) hold a bogus movie audition to find his perfect mate. Old guy finds woman of his dreams but low and behold, she's crazy. Very exciting ending and extremely well crafted thriller. Departure from the usual Miike insanity. Slow but worth the wait.
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

Rating:

The Trailer

Fudoh: The New Generation (Review)

Directed by Takashi Miike

Insano Steve says: Teenage Yakuza Riki Fudoh has his underage crime syndicate running like clockwork. His team features child assassins and women who shoot vaginal blowgun darts and the usual assortment of misfits. But to claim control of Kyushu island, he must off his father who is the leader of the controlling Yakuza. Fortunately, this can only be achieved violently with as much bloodshed as possible.

Based on a Manga. Gratuitous beheadings, acid burning and hermaphrodites (God bless those sexually gifted freaks) are always appreciated.

Rating:
The Trailer

Wapakman (Official Trailer)

I don't know how I missed this debut trailer of Wapakman after being overcome with Manny "Pacman" Pacquiao hype over the last few days. But after seeing him demolish Miguel Cotto on Saturday night and retaining the prestige as the best pound for pound boxer in the world, after watching 4 24/7 episodes on HBO and hearing him sing on Jimmy Kimmel, you'd think I'd be all over this (I posted the teaser a while back)

Better late than never, right

Manny Pacquiao is the hero of the Philippines, an athlete who is regarded as the best boxer by all. He's defeated the best of the best. Marquez, Morales, Barerra, De La Hoya, Hatton and now Cotto. And so seeing him battle a hot vixen with supersonic breasts, a lava man and a giant crab should be no problem right?

Wapakman is going to rival any zany or insane Japanese movie with its crazininess. Here be the plot.

Magno is an ordinary man whose world revolves around his five kids while his wife, Magda, works as a nurse in Italy. One night Magno meets an accident. A car crashes into his truck and, upon impact, a big explosion takes place. Miraculously, Magno survives unscathed. The blowup is caused by Walo-walo, an organic substance which stores energy that is almost as powerful as nuclear energy. Soon, he wakes up and feels like a new man. Lighter. Faster. Stronger. Interestingly, his newfound powers start helping him become a better dad. His wish of being faster, smarter and stronger for his family is coming true. He assumes the identity of their favorite superhero - WAPAKMAN!

Soon, Magno learns that Magda has come back to take the kids with her to Italy. Magno wants his family to be together - happy and whole. He doesn't want to let go of the kids. But can he be a good dad in the eyes of his kids and still be a superhero? Magno knows that with Wapakman around the world will be a much safer place for his kids. This is a responsibility he just can not turn away from, but if it means losing his kids ... Can he give up being a superhero if it means saving the world? It is the hardest choice he has ever had to face and he must make a decision. Fast!

Directed by Topel Lee, and also starring Batista (from the WWE) and some other top Filipino stars, the movie is scheduled for release in the Philippines on Christmas Day, December 25th.

Enjoy the awesome trailer courtesy of Twitch.