New York, New Yuck (NYC Movies from the Exploitation Era)

Oh New York, New York. The city so nice they named it twice (well you know they did that because they knew somebody was gonna steal the first name). My hometown is the greatest city in the world. But it wasn't always the Disney-fied, tourist filled haven we have today. I remember walking the fucked up Times Square and being offered drugs for sale at 2pm in the afternoon. Oh those were the days.

Mind you this is not me reminiscing about the 70s grindhouse Times Square, this was even in the late 80s and early 90s. I saw Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Next Generation in one of the last grindhouse theaters near the Crossroads of the World. About a dozen people packed a theater that should have been shut down. But I digress.

I love my city but the movies during the Exploitation Era made it seemed we were fuckin Detroit. And at times, they were deadly accurate. So here are 10 movies (not necessarily in fucked up order) that showed the seedier, dirtier and grimier side of NYC back in the day.

When are ya gonna come and visit?



10.) Maniac Cop

Fictional NYC is...filled with a maniac cop who kills innocent people.

Reality NYC is...filled with a maniac cops who kill innocent people. OK maybe not all the time but if your color is off white or brown you may get maimed. See ya later if you're black. The NYPD have hiccups every now and then which is why we got Rev. Al Sharpton holding a press conference and march every 10 minutes.

9.) C.H.U.D.

Fictional NYC is...filled with cannibalistic humanoid underground dwellers who kill and eat people. Need I really say more?

Reality NYC is...inhabited by rats the size of footballs and insects that rival SyFy cheesiness. I'm serious about the rats as during the summer months they will show up on the train platform and wait for the 7 train while checking their Facebook on their iPhone 4. These are some of the smartest, mutant rats you will ever see.






8.) Q The Winged Serpent

Fictional NYC is...a giant serpent monster that lay its egg in the Chrysler tower and start terrorizing New Yorkers. It also likes grabbing sunbathers and window washers.

Reality NYC is... the NYPD is ill equip to handle a giant monster serpent who is under the control of a deranged madman. Sure they can stop a bomb threat or two in the middle of Times Square but let loose a ravenous monster and we're all fucked.





7.) Escape from New York

Fictional NYC is...a maximum security federal penal colony where gangs, criminals and the unwanted live in chaos.

Reality NYC is...we call this place the Bronx.





6.) The Warriors

Fictional NYC is...over run with gangs who pretty much own every piece of real estate in all 5 boroughs in NYC.

Reality NYC is...oh NYC still has gangs but they are all in the bad bad places we direct tourists to when they're lost. "You're looking for Rockefeller Center?" asks a tourist. "Oh thats in Bed Stuy, you should go at night" directs a disgruntled New Yorker. "...and be sure to wear red"





5.) Combat Shock

Fictional NYC is...deteriorating and completely falling apart. We ignore our returning vets who have shell shock, we can't get them jobs because of the economy and the streets have been taken over by drug dealers, pimps and prostitutes. Oh and all the babies are deformed freaks.

Reality NYC is...ditto. except for the deformed babies. Hmm then again, I'm sure there are deformed babies somewhere that we don't know about.





4.) Street Trash

Fictional NYC is...the homeless and the despair will drink anything to forget their troubles. NYC is where life is cheaper than a bottle of Viper

Reality NYC is...the new place where the homeless and the despair congregate is called "Williamsburg". The new drink of choice is "Pabst Blue Ribbon aka PBR" and we call these people "hipsters". You can identify these hipsters with scruffy beards, sports jackets with t-shirts and smoking Clove cigarettes and playing kickball. They are highly toxic.




3.) Ms. 45

Fictional NYC is...filled with drug dealers, pimps and gangs that prey on mute women and rape them....repeatedly. Oh yeah, vigilantism is totally legal so get your vengeance on!

Reality NYC is...now just filled with women who all look like the Sex and the City meets Hannah Montana. The women who have been scorned or fucked up get revenge by getting into flame wars on Facebook or deleting their boyfriend's WOW account. Also, somehow the ex boyfriend's comic book collection ends up on Craigslist. Wow, that's just fucked up brutal.




2.) Driller Killer

Fictional NYC is...a psychotic dude goes around killing people with a drill.

Reality NYC is...this is what most New Yorkers want to do to tourists who block pedestrian traffic.




1.) Maniac

Fictional NYC is...a mad man is on the loose and killing people all around the city.

Reality NYC is...seriously, you don't want to come here. I think I wanna move now.



When's the last time you were in NYC? Do you like our tourist friendly, Nickelodeon city now? Did you visit the city when it was a haven for debauchery and filth? Are you totally fuckin scared of NYC???

If you know of any other NYC grindhouse/exploitation movies, share em by leaving a comment below.

I *HEART* NY.

2009 NYC Horror Film Festival (Featured Films)

Well October is over but for us New Yorkers, the horror keeps screaming. Just announced is the lineup for the NYC Horror Film Festival that takes place from November 18th to the 22nd.

Here's some snippers from the official press release.

The NYCHFF will take place November 18 - 22, 2009 and will be held at the Tribeca Cinemas, located at 54 Varick Street at Canal Street . The NYCHFF’s Kick-Off Gala will take place on November 18 at 8:00pm at BLVD (Spring & Bowery) and will feature five bands, 20 short films, complimentary cocktails and more.

Programming for the festival includes more than 50 horror and Sci-fi feature and short films, parties, and panel discussions.

The festival’s 2009 feature film presentations are:

Cornered (Feature / Horror)

Directed by Daniel Maze

A serial killer is stalking the gritty streets of Los Angeles . It’s all over the news, but that doesn’t stop the crew at a local convenience store from their weekly poker game. Now, trapped inside the store with a deranged killer the group must fight to make it through the night alive. Stars Steve Guttenberg, James Duval and the hysterical Ellia English.

Must Love Death (Feature / Horror / Comedy)

Directed by Andreas Schaap

Disappointed by love and suicidal people, Norman arranges to meet a group of like-minded people. But when he arrives at the meeting the alleged suicides goes very wrong and hilarity and blood start to flow freely.

Sweatshop (Feature / Horror)

Directed by Stacy Davidson

A group of rave promoters decide to throw a party in an enormous vacant factory... But when the oversexed friends throw back a few drinks and begin setting up, they soon realize, a beastly all-seeing presence resides in this enormous place, and it drags a mammoth, inhuman weapon that serves only one purpose: to end the lives of anyone who trespasses here.

The Revenant (Feature / Horror / Comedy)

Directed by D. Kerry Prior

Officer First Class Bart Gregory is killed while fighting in Middle East . His body is shipped back to the United States and laid to rest, but before the lid can be put on his tomb, Bart inexplicably awakens in his coffin and climbs from his grave; A Vampire? A Zombie? No…..A Revenant! Now, this average guy must feed on human blood or rot away.

Nosferatu; Orlok The Vampire in 3D!! (Feature / Retrospective)

Directed by F.W. Munarau

This classic 1921 silent film Directed by F.W. Murnau and staring the immortal Max Shriek as Count Orlok is reborn completely restored, remastered and brought back to life in gorgeous 3D. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity for film fans to see one of the greatest and one most recognizable classic silent horror films in 3D on the big screen!

Maidenhead (Feature / Horror / Art House)

Directed by Jim Spanos

Poor Martin doesn’t have much of a life. He doesn’t have a girlfriend, he hasn’t been sleeping well, and he still lives at home... with his father, who is an obnoxious, bloodthirsty monster strapped to a bed. Did we mention he isn’t sleeping well? Martin (AJ Bowen of House of the Devil and The Signal) spends his days going numbly about the business of tending to his Dad’s grisly needs. Every day is just like the last, until Martin meets an innocent church-going girl named Meredith, who gives him hope of something more. But what about Dad?

The Shadow Within (Feature / Horror / Ghost)

Directed by Silvana Zancolo

In a gloomy and sinister atmosphere, little Maurice Dumont can’t escape his infernal reality. Dominated by an inhuman mother who rejects him, an absent father and the ghost of his brother who refuses to die. In a claustrophobic overwhelming environment, obsessed by dead and living presences, Maurice seems to have no way out, as death silently creeps into his old gothic house.

Maniac (Feature / Retrospective & Achievement Award)

Directed by Willaim Lustig

This 1980 grindhouse classic is back on the big screen! Starring Joe Spinell as the deranged Frank Zito. Frank is an embittered loser who talks to himself and his dead mother, stalks a pretty model (legend Caroline Munro), and spends his spare time brutally murdering and scalping women. A pristine 35 mm print will screen as part of this Lifetime Achievement Award program dedicated to Director / Producer William Lustig.

William Lustig Lifetime Achievement Award

As a kid, auteur William Lustig avidly watched a huge volume of lowdown trashy exploitation fare on 42nd Street ’s grindhouse theaters. Working way through the film business, Lustig found himself at the center of a storm of controversy when he made the grim, and gory landmark horror film "Maniac" which boasts an incredibly intense performance by legendary character actor Joe Spinell and hideously graphic make-up f/x by horror icon Tom Savini. Lustig followed up with the tough, gritty and exciting urban revenge thiller "Vigilante." He delivered another winner with the terrific "Maniac Cop," and the series follow ups 2 & 3, Hit List"and the suspenseful serial killer thriller "Relentless" all excellent and entertaining. Lustig's last film as a director was the nifty fright flick "Uncle Sam." William Lustig has also produced a staggering 84 films and TV projects to date. He went on to create the distribution company Blue Underground that lovingly restores and puts out some of the best classic genre films of all time!

Blood Night: The Legend of Mary Hatchet (Feature / Horror)

Directed by Frank Sabatella

Long Island, 1978: A young girl named Mary Mattock gruesomely murders her family and is locked away at the notorious Kings Park Psychiatric Center . Ten years later Mary escapes, leaving a grizzly wake of bodies and blood. Gunned down by the police, Mary meets her own demise outside the sanitarium walls. This incident gave birth to the legend of Mary Hatchet’s walking ghost and the mischievous night named in honor of her death, BLOOD NIGHT! Starring genre favorites Bill Moseley and Danielle Harris, Blood Night puts a neck-breaking spin on the gory and gut wrenching slasher films of the 80’s.

For more information and tickets, visit the festival’s website: http://www.nychorrorfest.com/.

I'm very excited to see The Revenant though I wouldn't mind seeing Maniac on the big screen for that shotgun blast to the head scene. If your in the NYC area, I would suggest trying to see one of these films...maybe I'll even see you there.