How Do You Write A Joe Scherman Song? (Trailer)

I've been seeing a lot of promos and posters all over NYC for NBC's new show Smash. I'll admit, this is not my sort of bag, but when jaded viewer friend Christina Rose dropped me a line informed me that Gary King's indie musical How Do You Write A Joe Scherman Song? is soon to be released I had to take a quick glance at the trailer (which is below).

Here be the plot:

Joe (Joe Schermann) dreams of hitting it big on Broadway. After landing an opportunity to write for an Off-Broadway musical, he is forced to cast either the love of his life Evey (Christina Rose) or his newly discovered muse Summer (Debbie Williams). The realities of show business prove to Joe that writing is easy, living is hard.

Christina is a brilliant actress (she was brilliant in Death of the Dead (see review here and interview here) and I'm sure she's going to show off all her talents: her beauty, singing and acting in this little slice of NYC indie film.

Here's more info via the Press Release:

HOW DO YOU WRITE A JOE SCHERMANN SONG is an original feature film musical written and directed by Gary King; music and lyrics by Joe Schermann; and original score by Ken Lampl. It stars the singer/songwriter of the same name Joe Schermann, Christina Rose (of Broadway's GREASE, Deadheads, & previously worked with King on "Death of the Dead"), Mark DiConzo ("New York Lately"), Debbie Williams, Jenn Dees ("What's Up Lovely") and Darly Ray Carliles (Jaradoa Theater). The incredible dance sequences in the film were choreographed by Mark DiConzo and Christina Rose. The indie film was funded primarily through crowdfunding (Kickstarter) which has led to a global fan base long before the film's release. Marcus Wolf and Edward A. Bishop of Flicker Dreams Productions served as executive producers.

Film festival screening announcements coming soon.

Check out the trailer.

HOW DO YOU WRITE A JOE SCHERMANN SONG - Official Trailer from Gary King on Vimeo.

For more info check out these links:

• Official Site
• Facebook Page
• Christina Rose Official Site
• Christina Rose Twitter Page
  

The Best Elephants, DIY Indies and OMG! Movies of 2011

Before I post my top 10 horror movies (yes it's coming soon), I wanted to go over the other movies (yes I saw other non horror flicks) that I thought were super duper awesome this year. From the box office Hollywood juggernauts to the indie spectaculars, these stood out like no other (plus there the only ones I saw). There are also a few films you may have missed that will completely blow you away.

"Box Office Elephants"

1.) Rise of the Planet of the Apes: Best sci-fi/action flick of the year. Serkin made me care about ape-kind.

2.) Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2: I'm a big Potter fan (shhhh) so I liked how it all ended.

3.) The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo: Rooney Mara gets all naked/grunty/scary in this remake of the Swedish bestseller. She drives a typical crime mystery into awesomeness.

"DIY Indie Spectaculars"

1.) Super: Not as good as Kick-Ass but fun nevertheless. Wilson and Page made an awesome crazy dynamic duo as normals become superheroes.

2.) Kaboom: Gregg Araki makes a comeback with a WTF film that will make you sexual uncomfortable as it will make you scratch your head...and your balls.

3.) Waldo the Dog: Best indie screener I received this year. Waldo the Dog will be unlike any other film you have ever seen. It's the equivalent of seeing a fancy car get wrecked, miraculously repaired and then totally wrecked again. As much as you'd like to look away you can't. It's just so mesmerizing to watch.

4.) A Foundling: A Foundling breaks the handcuffs of the conventional indie film. It's a serial Western with a twist and though follows such a simple story of 2 sisters reunited, it's even smart enough to comment on the world around them.

"The OMGs"

1.) Ninja Kids!!!: One of the best films of 2011 from Takashi Miike. Ninja Kids is like Spy Kids on acid. Think Harry Potter but with over the top ninjas and slapstick comedy. It's a cute Japanese family film with a Miike insanity mixed in. And it works from start to finish. It's super duper funny, has some dog poop humor and a ton of CGI madness that only Miike could think up. Based on a long running Japanese TV show called Rantaro the Ninja Boy, it's filled with humor that's international in the LOLs. It's got visual wackiness, self aware parodies and villains that are basically clowns with swords and ninja stars.

What you get is a family comedy that leaves you feeling freakin awesome after you leave the theater. Ninja Kids is heartwarming Japanese wackiness, the Miike way.

2.) BKO: Bangkok Knockout: BKO: Bangkok Knockout which is without a doubt, the best action movie of 2011. BKO is an orgy and ballet of violence set to a soundtrack. You won't know the names of the characters or care if the bad guys get their comeuppance. Seriously, it's not important.

As long as you were mesmerized by the punches, kicks, double kicks, double punches and the synchronized attacks, BKO has done it's job.

******************************************************

What non horror movies did you think were the best of 2011? Let me know!

Kidnapped (Review)

Kidnapped

Kidnapped aka Secuestrados (2011)

Directed by Miguel Ángel Vivas

I've always thought the home invasion film is one of the most terrifying genres in all of horror. I mean the reason why is pretty obvious. It realistically could happen. That's terrifying as shit right?

Lots of movies have been made about this and I've seen a lot of them. Them (aka Ils), The Strangers, Inside and Funny Games are all the notables. When I first saw Michael Haneke's Funny Games, I'll admit I was blown away. Vicious violence and Haneke's attempt to chide us and ask if we were desensitized to it all was revolutionary. Now we're given yet another home invasion film that's just as nihilistic and unrelenting as Funny Games and one has to ask why?

Vivas's Kidnapped is a Spanish import that puts the audience uncomfortably close to a home invasion playing in real time and let's us squirm as a family is robbed, tortured and terrorized. It's pure cinematic wickedness as Vivas employs only a few cuts/edits and instead hovers the camera around the action as it plays. It's a damn eerie and effective technique, one where audience has nowhere to escape but feel as terrorized as this family.

But the problem with Kidnapped lies not in it's dread or viciousness but in it's characters. Our family are ridiculously badly drawn: Dad is inept, Mom is too houswifey and daughter seems like a spoiled brat. The bad guy's don't fair either. I'm going to use a Miami Heat analogy that may or may not work to explain their dumb-ititude.

In the end Kidnapped will shock the shit out of you (that ending will stick in your mind like a splinter) but says nothing of why violence fascinates us. Kidnapped is awesome style, but little substance and stands on the lower ladder of the home invasion genre. It's also why I disliked The Strangers so much. I need more than "Because you were home".

Boring Plot-O-Matic

Three hooded Eastern-European criminals burst into a home in a Madrid gated community, holding the family hostage in its own home, and forcing the father to empty his credit cards.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

Let's get that pesky plot out of the way. Innocent Spanish family has just moved into an awesome new home and they display all those qualities of rich families I despise. Dad is mega rich, Mom is all into house wife duties and the daughter wants to party. When 3 ski masked criminals invade their home, they are abused and fucked up. Dad is forced to get PINs for all his credit cards and driven out into the city and take out the max from ATMs. Meanwhile, mom and daughter are guarded into a sense of home invasion normalcy.

Later, unexpected visitors ring that damn doorbell and get caught in the mix. It's up to our fearless duo to make sure their master heist goes according to plan. The camera work here is utterly flawless. The shots hover like a guardian angel, we peek in from scene to scene with no cutting whatsoever. Violence becomes almost dreamlike. In one scene where our girls try to escape, the terror is amplified by a Vivas technique where he goes split screen and we see the action take place simultaneously. It's damn effective revealing the horror of both scenes. My eye wandered to the criminals as I knew I'd see mega fuckedupness on their end.

It's this style that is suspenseful and draws an eager viewer into this hellish world that's taking place. Kidnapped is paced so well that it's a testament to the actors and actresses to get all their dialogue, motions, etc all accomplished without any cuts. You really do admire this type of cinema as its exhilarating to watch.

Let me go into that Miami Heat analogy. When one goes into home invasion as a criminal activity you'd think the 3 of them would be on the same page. Let's break them down with their Heat counterparts.

Master Chief Criminal: Wade

We have a leader who is the one takes the dad around town maxing out his cards. You'd think this guy could be able to handle his crew but you'd be wrong. He's doesn't have the pulse of his team and seems to be a useless kind of leader. But you get the feeling he's gonna put a dagger through your heart and come up with a Wade like game winning bucket.

Petty Criminal Crazy Guy: LeBron

OK this guy is kinda nuts. He goes all crazy and almost goes all Lebron in the 4th quarter. The entire heist was in jeopardy because of his actions. He goes all murdery on a inspector and decides to "SVU" the daughter. He's totally the muscle of the crew but definitely a total choker...you know like Lebron.

Petty Criminal Morality Guy: Bosh

This guy has a total change of heart and feels bad that Lebron guy is totally fucking up everybody and is out of control. Like Bosh, he's the 3rd fiddle and he brings absolutely nothing to the game. If you're recruiting for a home invasion, you need soldiers willing to do anything to get the job done. They brought Morality Bosh Guy. And he's a fuckin pussy.

So there you have it. Your Big Three master criminals. The master plan is completely flawed. How much can one really max out from an ATM machine to get a big score? Not a helluva alot I would imagine. Home invasions are bash and dash. You get in, you loot and you get out. But these guys are having a fuckin sleepover. Plus their team isn't as solid as one might think with a bad captain, a crazy guy and a wuss.

If it wasn't for Wade guy saving the day, they'd have lost to the damn Cleveland Cavaliers family. In every home invasion movie, the family always tries to fight back or escape. And sure our family does here. I'd take the argument that summoning up courage is hard to do when you fear for your life. But one has to make sure when they are fighting back, you actually defeat your enemy. I like to think in a way that the family was only up by 2 pts and thought they had won the game. That's when Amazing happens.

Kidnapped's characters are just not at all interesting and the logic is a little off. The style as I said was spectacular but the substance of what this nihilistic journey was for is lacking. In Funny Games, Haneke broke the 4th wall and talked to the audience and asked us what WE WOULD DO. It seemed that Haneke wanted to provoke the audience and ask why we want to see the violence and when he REWINDS the action, we're even more thrilled. There is a message within Funny Games with its clean cut villains and the quagmire they give the family.

In Kidnapped, it's all glitz and glamour. Oh we see our big 3 wreak havoc, we see the dazzling dunks of gore and splatter and a game winning shot and I enjoyed seeing this mayhem. But it didn't really give me anything to talk about after seeing it. I didn't come away with something that might be thought provoking or worthwhile.

Kidnapped gives you a taste of home invasion genre, the life and death struggle but doesn't have a conceptual theme of what we just saw. It's nihilism for nihilism's sake and sometimes that's all you get.

Nude-ipedia

Daughter has serious cleavage issues

Gore-ipedia

Sliced throats
Gunplay
SVU action
If I told you more, the movie might be spoiled

WTF moment

The ending

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

I know Kidnapped is high on many Top 10 lists and it will get an honorable mention from me in mine. I expect more from my home invasion and I got what I expected. European imports usually have both style and substance. I'm kinda shocked Kidnapped didn't have the latter.

Rating:


Check out the trailer.

Rage (Review)

Rage

Rage (2011)

Directed by Christopher Witherspoon

Who knew 40 years ago, a TV movie by an unknown director named Steven Spielberg would still be influencing filmmakers today? With Duel, Spielberg made a statement about man's isolation against a force of nature or something like that.

That's where Rage draws it's inspiration from and because of this influence, director/producer/editor Chris Witherspoon even drew up a scene commenting on what the metaphor might be. One can make up comparisons but I'm pretty sure Generation Y and Z have never seen Duel. So Rage becomes it's own malevolent little indie that takes cat vs mouse to a whole new level. What Witherspoon has created is a tense, suspenseful and amped movie about a ordinary Oregonian with his share of secrets and thrown him into a deadly game vs a masked villain whose motivations are also hidden in secrecy.

Rage plays with it's audience so well, I even got duped by its overall simplicity (I'll explain in a bit). It's a mix of Hitchcockian slickness, Twilight Zone twistiness and Spielberg terror magic. Sure it's hindered by its low budget and some odd flashback placement but overall it's an entertaining movie that plays out like a long riddle of emotion.

Rage tricked me big time and it's why it was so much fun.


Boring Plot-O-Matic

A thirty something man who lives in a suburb just outside of Portland says goodbye to his beautiful and loving wife and heads into town. There he unintentionally provokes the wrath of a mysterious motorcyclist. The confrontation between the two, sets in motion a day long battle. Beginning in the form of harmless taunts then quickly escalating into something more serious and then into something unimaginable.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

So we get to hang out with Dennis Twist (Rick Crawford), a 30 something writer from Portland, OR who with his wife Crystal (Audrey Walker) live the American suburban life. But all is not well with the Dennis. He has a few secrets and on his day off, we're going to see all of them. As he drives off in his SUV we see him get into a scuffle with a black helmeted motorcyclist over a parking spot. Dismissed, he meets with his mistress who he breaks off an affair and also meets with a friend where they discuss his failed writing career.

Soon the stalking of Dennis begins and the motorcyclist is appearing at every angle. He is taunted at a red light, then his car gets keyed is only the beginning. Later his breaks are cut and a random beatdown at a bathroom get it all into the bit of ultra violence. Dennis plays mouse and our Darth Vader mute (he doesn't speak throughout the film) are gaming it up for all of us to see. It's not until Dennis gets home does all shit hit the fan. Uber gorehounds with rejoice in the splatterific scenes involving chainsaws, stab-o-palooza and an uncomfortable rape-ture. The end of Rage is pure madness and one final twist breaking down what the fuck just happened is the WTF of the entire movie.

Let me get what irked me out of the way. There is a bit of bad acting by all (Dennis's neighbors are cardboardy) and Rick Crawford who plays Dennis goes in and out of his Irish accent on more than one occasion. During highly emotional scenes, none of our actors can emote above a 5. But overall Crawford plays a mousey mouse well and shows a man littered with guilt and believes karma is out to get him.

Witherspoon also added a few B/W tinted flashbacks of scenes that only happened 5 minutes before. I have no idea why these were added. I'm pretty certain I was following along and didn't need a reminder. There were also a few odd camera angles that had me scratching my head ( a lunch scene in particular was a bit odd)

But these can be forgiven because Witherspoon for an indie does a nice job of getting SUV vs motorcycle shots all over Portland. Solid camera work for on the location shooting and I was impressed. It's a testament to Witherspoon's ability to make low level speeding into car chasing awesome.

Rage is clearly a guessing game. Witherspoon plays with the audience tossing in clues and red herrings to get us emotionally vested as well as riddling all of us. His mistress ex BF might be the man under the helmet but we savvy vets are ultimately going with the Twilight Zone route and expect somebody else. Everybody wants to know who this road rager is and why he might be doing it but it's not until the end do we get a clear explanation. At first, I thought I had been gypped, that all that had occurred was too far fetched for our stalker to go through to exact revenge.

But I remembered a scene Witherspoon inserted mid way in where cordial social parking protocol was followed and realized what I was watching. The movie wants you to believe our psychopathic biker is the embodiment of karma, what goes around comes around. Our man Dennis has to pay for his transgressions, for all the evil that he has done to his wife and to others. It's a brilliant play on the audience's preconceived notions of what we SHOULD expect. But the world is a much simpler place. People get angry for the stupidest and dumbest reasons and real ultra violence happens for far less. I mean people got beatdown for retro Air Jordans, wedding dresses and an Xbox during Black Friday madness.

All the clues lead to Rage. It's the damn title in the movie and the clues are littered throughout peaking at that scene I mentioned earlier. Witherspoon's Rage is so creatively smart that even the best cinema-phile might have been duped. It's one of the best movies I saw in 2011 and I'm going to keep my eyes on Witherspoon (he played the biker BTW). In a few years, we might be calling it Witherspoon terror magic instead.

Nude-ipedia

Nada

Gore-ipedia

Chainsaw trauma
Stabby stab stab stab

WTF moment

The reveal at the end

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

I get a lot of indie screeners sent to me and I toss them into a pile and figure I'll get to them eventually. But the horror blogosphere is getting this little indie the buzz it deserves and I decided to watch it based on the hype.

Rage has no release date but it has won tons of awards. Rage won top honors at the 2011 Horror Quest Film Festival in Atlanta, Georgia. Rage screened in festivals across America and all over the world including the Oldenburg International Film Festival in Oldenburg, Germany and the Cryptshow Film Festival in Barcelona, Spain.

Hopefully Witherspoon gets a distributor so the horror universe can see this awesome bad boy.

The Vitals

• The official site

Rating:


Check out the trailer.

Attack the Block (Review)

Attack the Block

Attack the Block (2011)

Directed by Joe Cornish

The first thing I noticed about Attack the Block is the dialogue. British ghetto younglings have a speech all their own and it's really mesmerizing to hear. Lots of "Get me?" and "love" and "Believe!". At times, I had no idea what the fuck they were saying. But that's the fascination right?

I know all the supposed "bad" neighborhoods in NYC. But I've been getting the feeling I should never set foot in Brixton in south London if I ever visit. Get these kids in a movie theater and shit gets loud (oh no he didn't go there!) Lots of ghetto kids go see a horror flick and will yell shit at the screen saying if faced in the same situation with the killah they'd "fuck that suckah up!" (they're words I cleaned up a bit) The beauty of Attack the Block is now we get to see these same tough thugs battle hairy, glowy teeth but blind alien monsters and see if they're all just talk.

Attack the Block is a mix of a thugged up Goonies meets Gremlins and it's all freakin awesome. Blending a mix of comedy, monster mayhem, action-palooza and some class warfare "MESSAGE!!" it's a slice of fun fun fun. The unlikely criminal tykes we bloody fuckin hate somehow grow up, learn a lesson and gain respect the hard way. Throw in some neato sci-fi monsters, a few splatter and gore and quick witted pop culture references rapid firing at a mile a minute and it's all the fun you'll have in 90 minutes.

Quick rehashed plot revolves around a thug of youths led by Moses who mug Sam a girl who lives in the projects (is that what they call em in London?). Soon our ragtag group of misfits (3 blacks, 1 white boy, Sam, pot smoker Brewis) are running and dodging these reject monsters from Star Wars. Aided by Nick Frost and also on the run from a kingpin drug dealer, the block is all in chaos in this one night.

The action scenes are well executed. The kids have bikes, scooters to aid in their escapes and they've got the weapons and use em. Samurai swords, knives and fireworks (the dangerous kind) all come into play and shit gets real fast for them. But these same kids, supposedly tough as nails get scared too. It's this balance in characters that makes them feel human and empathetic. The fact they know the choices they make have consequences is a theme throughout. Lots of good suspense and wicked kills are littered throughout ATB and director Joe Cornish paces it nicely.

He also puts in great scenes of funny jampacked with British references. They call the monsters gollums (LOTR) and Dobbies (HP) and it breaks the tension to have them be all kids in such an adult situation. Any reference to video games will give me a chuckle.

Sure it's a bit silly at times and the monsters aren't very memorable as they should be, but it's forgivable. Clearly we get racial overtones and "the feds" are willing to go all Rodney King on any black youth we see. I mean after seeing the shit that went down during the London riots (that video of the foreign exchange kid getting jumped comes to mind) you really want to hate these brothas from south London in real life and in this movie. But it's all about the choices they make and here they make the right ones.

Attack the Block is a sci-fi kid adventure and twisting the protagonists around makes it worthwhile. You'll rarely see a film that takes the outrageous cheesiness of furry alien monsters and blend it in with thug life. It's a one of a kind movie, one with charm and scares.

Believe.

Rating:


Check out the trailer.

The Innkeepers (Review)

The Innkeepers

The Innkeepers (2011)

Directed by Ti West

There is a king of the slow burn horror movie and his name is Ti West. West, who's filmography includes The Roost, Cabin Fever 2 and The House of Devil has made a name for himself in the methodically paced horror movie. I was not a fan of this in The House of the Devil writing:

"However, at the end of the day the movie is a wicked slow slow slow burn. It takes so long to get to the nitty gritty that no Red Bulls were helping to keep me awake."

However, in The Innkeepers the slow burn has hills and valleys and surprisingly has humor in it filled with cleverisms and pop culturisms that rescue it from being engulfed in eternal boredom. It dabbles in LOLs while fine tuning a ghost story as it's central premise. What you get is a fun, mish mash of amateur ghost hunter hipsters making contact with the ethereal plain which slowly evolves The Innkeepers into a non laughing matter.

The Innkeepers is smart enough to know it's audience and by doing so gives us an old fashioned spooky throwback ghost story that balances the line between being cute and scary. The characters are drones, the guests are odd and the ghosts are cliched visual jump scares. With all the said, I still had a few problems with West's lack of a firepower ending and his overabundance to drag the movie into zzzzzzzzzzz territory but some things can be overlooked when I'm having fun.

But I'm all for the nostalgia for my vintage Poltergeists for the new millennium. The Innkeepers could be Generation X's's answer to that 80s classic.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

After over one hundred years of service, The Yankee Pedlar Inn is shutting its doors for good. The last remaining employees - Claire (Sara Paxton) and Luke (Pat Healy)- are determined to uncover proof of what many believe to be one of New England's most haunted hotels. As the Inn’s final days draw near, odd guests check in as the pair of minimum wage “ghost hunters” begin to experience strange and alarming events that may ultimately cause them to be mere footnotes in the hotel’s long unexplained history.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

When you do a supernatural horror movie, you can possibly go one of two ways. You can go all LOLs or you could go deadly serious. It seems Ti West elected to do both. In The Innkeepers, Claire (Sara Paxton) and Luke (Pat Healy) are hotel worker drones who man the Yankee Pedlar Inn (in CT) for one last weekend before it goes out of business. There is a history of dread, as the hotel has a legend of Madeline O'Malley, whose death in a cellar has caused her to haunt this now defunct hotel.

The movie revolves around the dynamic of our hipster duo. Luke documents the history of his paranormal workplace on a website while Claire is in awe of a famous old timey actress (who she adores) that has checked into the hotel. Both are realistic drones who burn their boredom away with clever dialogue, actual job duties, beer and a search for scientific proof of the supernatural.

Staying at the hotel 24/7, they take shifts but at night, Claire goes all Fox Mulder and starts hearing the creeks and squeaks of something not right. It's here West goes all slow burn, hovering above Claire as she searches the remnants of a hotel (sometimes in full daylight) other times in the dead of night. Sara Paxton has a mesmerizing quality that made me buy into her performance. Claire is an asthmatic, everyday girl whose ambition has slowly died away. Paxton's performance is quirky stellar, similar to that of the cutout of a "hot gamer girl" but in this case "hot ghost hunter girl".

Pat Healy's Luke is goofball lovable. He's the horror geek, bad at web design, obsessed with the supernatural and possibly infatuated with his partner in crime. And his performance is not condescending to us horror hipsters at all. I could easily call these characters my friends.

But West wants to make sure that you get just enough haha's before he unleashes his House of the Devil style slow burn jump scares. And don't worry you get some eerie buildup of falsehoods and glimpses of either hallucinations, dreams or actual paranormal phenomenon. The fact that it's vague is part of the charm all the way to the end. It's almost a perfect film in how the atmosphere gets built up (a lost art in my opinion) and a perfect blueprint feature resembling those viral Internet videos with the "actual ghost footage" that leads to a growly scream of a "ghost" that usually scares the shit out of you.

My gripes, though few, are the things I originally said about House/Devil. I appreciate the false alarms but they take fuckin a Lord of the Rings trilogy to get there. Other characters such as Leanne Rease-Jones (played by Kelly McGillis) is the equivalent of the guy who always knows about the legend. Leanne plays a healer/medium who senses danger but elects to stay at the creepy hotel anyway. A few more guests make appearances but none add to the overall film.

Finally, I still don't think Ti West knows how to end a film. With such buildup, one demands an ending which can hold up the entire movie. Instead, West goes all conventional and I was a bit disappointed. I'm not looking for some M. Night Shalatwisters, but it still felt a little flat.

But as I said before The Innkeepers is damn fuckin smart. Characters react as I thought I would react, they get nervous, stammer and crack jokes like I would. Call me a horror hipster too. I'm not ashamed. The Innkeepers is a Generation X ode to the horror ghost story that younglings will like but keep us hardcore aged horror fanatics on our toes. I love my nostalgia not remade but repackaged in original creative tales. Ti West has finally made a movie I liked, nay loved. That's a first.

The slow burn horror king has built a kingdom with a unique style, flair and has a treasure room of all those very familiar cliches. Sometimes royalty shares the wealth with the people and Ti West does just that. Hopefully the 99% will see The Innkeepers for the gem that it is.

Nude-ipedia

Sara Paxton shows some leg (she's so damn cute!)

WTF moment

The first encounter with Madeline O'Malley

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

The Innkeepers will premiere on Video in Demand on December 30th, 2011. It'll be in theaters on February 3rd, 2012 courtesy of Magnet Releasing. The film is in conjunction with Dark Sky Films and Larry Fessenden's Glass Eye Pix.

The Innkeepers is definitely going to find a place on my Top 10 of 2011 list. If you're looking for a quality old fashioned spookster, this is the perfect film.

The Vitals

• Facebook Page

Rating:

Check out the trailer.

The Shortround: Kill Devil Hill (Watch the entire short for FREE!)

[NOTE: I reviewed this short a while back but director, Robert de Almeida III is giving us all a special treat as Kill Devil Hill will stream for free in October. You can watch the entire short below and then read my review after!]

Rarely does a short pack a punch in it's 12 minutes to leave me with my mouth wide open. But there's a first time for everything I guess. Ace Jordan's Kill Devil Hill I thought was a slow burn horror flick with Satanic overtones. But that slow burn fired up and by the end I was completely shocked by the intensity of it all.

Let's get the plot out of the way first. See below.

On a day trip with his family to Kill Devil Hill, Jesse Reed (Taylor Graham) chases after his son Joey (Aiden Miranda) who has mischievously run off into the woods nearby. Joey discovers the remnants of some demonic pagan ritual. The skull of a bull head, made entirely out of gold, hangs from a large oak tree. Joey touches the inverted pentagram on the skull only to find that it has been drawn in blood. Frightened, Joey slowly backs away.

Suddenly, the skull begins to 'come to life' inside an epic orb of light. Joey's eyes glow as it appears that something supernatural is trying to enter his body. He faints and the golden skull vanishes into thin air. Moments later, Jesse finds his son laying on the ground. He picks him up and carries him out of the woods. Late that night, Jesse wakes to use the bathroom. While washing his hands, he looks in the mirror and sees that his eyes are glowing with the same supernatural force that has invaded his son just hours before...

WATCH THE SHORT!!!

If the video doesn't work, click here.

the jaded viewer says: Kill Devil Hill is a slick reenactment of past crime in small town America. Many of these horrific crimes never get told but they should and Kill Devil Hill is a step in the right direction to tell the tale.

As I said before, it's a slow burn for a short but the final 4-6 minutes is a helluva a jolt. The set up is clearly intentional with a relaxed atmosphere of sleepy time as we meet our Americana family. But it seems not all is what it seems and through a flashback we see how the morning's events are going lead to a long night.

The Satanic overtones are clearly visible. Devil stars and makeshift sacrifice altar are in the woods Joey visits. We see something is haunting both father and son and when we get to the end, all hell is unleashed.

The performances are solid with some nice funny ha ha's all around. The final minutes are brutally vicious in their rawness. I thought they'd go all PG-13 but nothing is quite impactful than seeing a crime photo slaughter of innocents.

My only gripes would be the special effects. There are quick shots of a bullhead acting a little supernaturally floaty as well as a quick scare bullhead attack. Somehow I felt this wasn't necessary. It bordered on cheesy and little over the top. Having it grounded in some sort of "what we don't see is a little more scarier" would have made this film perfect.

But that doesn't diminish a real world crime translated into a fictional what if scenario. The short clearly screams "Why? Why? Why?!" but all is left unanswered. Kill Devil Hill is a fantastic slice of pseudo True Crime cinema. Here's hoping it can be extended to a full length film one day.

The Vitals

• The Official Site
• IMDB Page
• Facebook Page

iCrime (Review)

iCrime

iCrime (2011)

Directed by Bears Fonté

The Truth and Cyberspace Collide

That's the tagline for iCrime, a stylized, indie film 2.0 that uses the MTV formula to tell a story about a Midwestern girl finding her way in the City of Angels.

I'll be honest, the poster and trailer make it look like it's a late night Skinemax after dark production. Go watch the trailer and don't tell me you didn't expect a scantily clad female seducing a dude to show up. But I was kind of surprised that this wasn't the case (and a little disappointed). In a weird way, iCrime is a perfect fit for a midnight showing on MTV. It clearly calls for the 18-34 year old demographic to eat up the content.

So what's the appeal to the Millennials? You have a murder mystery wrapped up with iJustine homages (or maybe a bit of Lonely Girl 15) with some fancy window editing, texting gimmicks, small town girl in a big city looking for love and a TMZ ripoff. It's a blend of Web 2.0 and film noir that clearly is more ambitious than it should be.

I'll admit I was very much entrenched in the goings of our lovely cutie Carrie but that's not to say it didn't have a mountain of flaws. It felt a bit unfocused at times and sometimes stressed style over substance. A supporting cast with little depth as well as subplots all over the place made it a bit over packed with shiznit.

But for a movie that plays on themes of the unsparkly side of Hollywood, family bonding, trust and betrayal, it works and for that I enjoyed my iCrime film viewing experience. Now check out what two millennials think.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

Carrie Kevin may seem like a typical Hollywood ingénue – a small-town girl looking to break into acting – but underneath her fresh-faced appearance is a girl on a mission. After learning that a journalist is about to go public with an old sex tape made by her cousin Stefy – a moderately successful pinup girl – Carrie makes a deal to provide the journalist with an even bigger story. Now she must venture into Hollywood’s seedy underbelly to expose the latest Internet sensation Jordan Rivers as a fraud. Yet, as Carrie delves deeper into the lies, deception and betrayal, she may end up making a name for herself after all – as the latest Hollywood murder victim.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

It's Fake-O Tweet-O-Vision!

MovieLover1992: @SelenaLovesKyle6 I just saw this awesome flk iCrime!

SelenaLovesKyle6: @MovieLover1992 OMG. Whats it about?

MovieLover1992: @SelenaLovesKyle6 Well this Okie girl comes to LA and works for a website called Echo Report and tries to prove this girl Jordan on YouTube is a total fake. As if!

SelenaLovesKyle6: @MovieLover1992 Sounds a bit like one of those shows on CW or ABC Family....I'm totally gonna watch!

MovieLover1992: @SelenaLovesKyle6 Yeah its got texting on screen, internet videos and chatting and OMG that ending is just crazy. Srlsy I was so shocked!

SelenaLovesKyle6: @MovieLover1992 Send me the trailer and a review. I wanna chk it out!

OK that's enough of my fake-o tweet-o vision. Director Bears Fonte debut film is clearly entrenched in a world that spins the small town girl in LA into a whole new direction. We've seen it before but here he's added a few Web 2.0 add ons to the mix. Carrie (Sara Fletcher) our Oklahoma noob tries to protect her cousin Stefy from a sex tape going public. But that plot line is just one of many which either detracts or enhances the film (to me, there were way to many things going on). The main plot line revolves around Carrie who works for "the Echo Report" online tabloid as she tries to expose the internet phenomenon Jordan, as she tries to prove she's an actress and not the innocent school girl she plays online.

The first thing about this film is the Web 2.0 generated gimmicks that get maxed exposure. We get the following:

• The Echo Report (TMZ-ish parody)
• Some gratuitous Skype-ing (video chatting)
• Texting in movie (as the texts appear like subtitles on screen)
• YouTube videos of our LonelyGirl/iJustine phenom "Jordan"
• YouTube response videos of Jordan's fans reacting to her ordeal
  
• Various references to message boards and social networking sites (you know the ones)

I don't mind all of these things in my movies. I laugh when Spyder Crawler or FrienderZ show up. Making an internet UGC movie without mentioning the obvious brands they reference is a staple. I mean you can't just say Twitter you know? The beauty of iCrime is it taps into a generation spoon fed info via 160 characters at a time. The Nancy Drew mystery Carrie investigates is a wee bit ridiculous but Sara Fletcher's performance was stellar and her presence onscreen negates any ridiculousness we see.

A few supporting roles from Zeffer (Carrie's possible love interest), Stefy her cousin looking for another big break, Raychel a fellow blogger and Jordan the web star are solid as they are just outright cardboard cutouts of a teen Lifetime movie of the week.

As Carrie searches for the truth, she also goes onto side quests that got distracting. From a blackmail plot of her cousin, to Hollywood insider parties she attends, to the budding relationship between her and lovable goofball Zeffer to ultimately the final reveal, it's a mish mash of filler scenes that got a bit convoluted. Fonte may have overloaded his script in his debut film with all these plot lines. In doing so he forgot to develop the characters into something more than caricatures. Carrie ultimately reveals a slew of problems she's dealing with, but all I cared about was the kidnapping gone awry. The twist can be predicted without a degree in sixth sense powers but it's as MovieLover1992 says: Srlsy I was so shocked!

That's not to say the it isn't fun to watch.

iCrime is filled with various LOLs that kept the movie moving. Fletcher does such a good job of being the champion of anti-fakeiness it becomes addicting. She's got that girl next door look, has various "cool" outfits and smokes...alot. The supporting players though one dimensional are still interesting and the movie has a decent soundtrack (including a live punk rock performance) It's a perfect film for the millennial generation as the web and CW-ish plot are easy to buy into. Occasionally, I like watching betrayal soaps with an interweb style that can be consumed in easily digestible morsels. Yeah I said it.

It's a credit for iCrime to deliver an indie movie that knows how to speak that Millennial language. Sometimes you feel like watching something that "MovieLover1992" and "SelenaLovesKyle6" are gonna love. There's no shame in that.

Nude-ipedia

Nada...but some PG-13 cleavage. Does that count?

WTF moment

Srly that ending OMG! FTW!

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

iCrime is being released via Breaking Glass Pictures via their Vicious Circle Films brand. It'll be out on DVD on September 27th. The DVD will include Deleted Scenes and runs about 103 minutes.

The inner millennial in you is itching to see this. It's up to you to decide if you should listen to that voice.

The Vitals

• The official site
• Breaking Glass Pictures (iCrime page)
• DVD available for Pre-Order today at www.breakingglasspictures.com
• Follow iCrime on Twitter
• Visit iCrime Facebook page

Rating:
1/2

Check out the trailer below.

Asylum Seekers (Review)

Asylum Seekers

Asylum Seekers (2009)

Directed by Rania Ajami

Lock me up and throw away the key.

Now this movie was tons of crazy fun. And when I say crazy, its literally crazy. Rania Ajami's Asylum Seekers is a film I haven't seen....well ever. It's like seeing a collage of crazy and making sense of it all. It's not going to be easy but your damn pesky brain tries.

Asylum Seekers is like Terry Gilliam's Brazil but in a mental institution. It's full wacky characters, surreal sets and live neuroses blended into a slushee of awesomeness. As the jaded viewer, the name exemplifies I've seen it all and nothing on screen will surprise me. But then comes along Asylum Seekers and makes some addictive dopamine that gives my brain a happy.

Asylum Seekers is a black comedy that takes you into the world of the surreal. It's the equivalent of tripping on acid, getting stoned, doing shrooms and drinking a cold glass of lemonade on a hot summer day. While totally whacked out of your mind, you may have no idea why your naked and feeding hard boiled eggs to a statue of a seal, but you know you're having fun. That's the same feeling you get watching this film.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

Work, deadlines, family, terrorism, information overload... As modern life pushes the world to the brink of madness, six strangers decide there’s only one sane response: head through the door marked EXIT. It leads to a deluxe, exclusive, luxuriously-appointed mental asylum where a staff will wait on them hand and foot for the rest of their carefree lives. The problem? The asylum has only one vacancy. Now, the group of would-be patients will have to prove who among them is truly most deranged. Of course, not everything in the asylum is as it seems, and as the applicants turn themselves over for evaluation, they learn that the insanity has just begun.

Director Rania Ajami’s boldly original feature-length debut is a surreal black comedy that questions the ways we define what is normal and what is not. Asylum Seekers takes its characters – and the audience – deep into the rabbit hole to a place where sanity is not an option.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

Our six insane in the membrane lunatics are all vying for a chance for that comfy bed and a place in The Asylum. They all each have unique disorders that cry out for help. We have Paul "the evangelical nihilist," Maude "the trophy mouse wife," Alan "the gender bender refuge", Alice "the cybernetic Lolita", Miranda "the introverted exhibitionist" and Raby, "the virgin nymphomaniac". Each member will be judged during their time in the asylum by Nurse Millie and her staff plus Dr. Beard, the all knowing honcho who echoes his voice through loudspeakers planted all over the building.

Now in a contest to claim the spot, each of the contestants wrestles with their neuroses with each other, with the staff and in a room of curiosity. Later, they duel out in a mock American Idol competition with stage performances and concoct their own plans to narrow down the competition. But what's a mental institution without loading up their patients full of drugs and experimenting on their subconscious by turning their heads into animals right?

It's just this amount of wacky that echoes an Alice in Wonderland style of eccentricity that makes the movie all out bonkers. What stands out are the production sets that are a saturation of vivid reds and greens and blues. Each room is unique from a mild mannered tile bathroom, to a makeshift bar to a waiting room where you well....wait. The costumes are each a delight when mixed in with the background. Alice our compu-nerd-holic (played by super hottie Stella Maeve) cosplays an awesome Sailer Moon outfit with a yellow tie. Miranda glows in green and Alan in super duper pink. It's a clash and contrast of rainbow visuals that makes for a stellar dreamlike quality. M&Ms meets Inception.

The cast does a stellar job of showing off the crazy. The movie focuses on Raby and Maude later in the flick and shows off some back story for each character. However, with such an ensemble like this, I'd like to have seen all our patients stories when they were on the outside. Being crazy in an asylum is one thing, but being nuts on the outside is like infinity times better.

And now we come down to the jokes. There are a few one liner zingers that had me cracking up "How do you have 0.4 kids?" Most of the LOLs and Hahas work but other's don't. There are moments of zzzzzzzzz and a few jokes that are clearly out of place. As much as I like completely banana characters, some of the musical numbers, dance numbers and one act numbers probably would have been funny in an off off off Broadway play.

But those are nitpicks to an otherwise insanely LEGEN wait for it DARY film. From impromptu karoake singing to oversized animal heads, Asylum Seekers might be the box office juggernaut in Wonderland. It has a hint of romanticism, a dash of wackiness, a nutmeg of linear saneness and a smidge of twisty twizzlers. I honestly have never seen anything like it and for that I'm glad. Ajami's first feature length film is a blast of creativity and fun. I'm looking forward to what she will do next.

A comedy like this needs to be seen. It has some of the most bizarre and WTF moments and like a hypnotic spell it's mesmerizing to watch just to see what would happen next. To put it another way, Asylum Seekers is exactly what I think a Lady Gaga dream looks like.

Nude-ipedia

I thought I saw side boobage. It could have just been porn I was looking at before I saw this film.

Gore-ipedia

Nada

WTF moment

Dr. Beard is revealed

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

The movie comes out on August 30th via Breaking Glass Pictures. It's about 90 minutes of the most shock therapy happy you'll get this year. I didn't have big expectations going into seeing Asylum Seekers but it totally blew me away.

I'm now picking up the pieces.

It may take some time but Asylum Seekers is bound for cult classic status. Hopefully we all discover this sooner than later.

The Vitals

• The official site
• Breaking Glass Pictures
• Facebook Page
  

Rating:


Check out the trailer.

Kickstarter/Indie GoGo: Are filmmakers bribing us for money?

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Press Release: Soska Sisters Dead Hooker in a Trunk released by IFC Midnight

Good news today for the Soska Sisters. After getting a UK release, Dead Hooker in a Trunk has finally hit the good ole US of A via IFC Midnight. It's long overdue for these awesome filmmakers. Check out the pres release below which has my quote in it as well (yay)

Also check out my review of the film. It's funny that I remember putting up this trailer 3 years ago (as the Soska Sisters will point out, this was one of the first amounts of hype for the film :-) ) and never thought I'd ever see it. But they sent me a screener and I was blown away. Hopefully you now all get the opportunity to see this little black humor piece of grindhousey horror film and have the same feeling as I did when I first saw it.

Check out the entire press release below.

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FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

DEAD HOOKER IN A TRUNK RELEASED BY IFC MIDNIGHT IN LIMITED THEATERS AND VOD

The Highly Anticipated Release of the Award Winning, Critically Acclaimed, Independent Hit, DEAD HOOKER IN A TRUNK!

WORLD PREMIERE -- AUGUST 3rd 2011 --

"You should check out DEAD HOOKER IN A TRUNK. They made it low budget and it's f*cking awesome. The violence is incredible and the stunts are fantastic." ~ Eli Roth, Director

After touring the film festival circuit and capturing the attention and adoration of critics and fans alike, the highly anticipated world release of the independent, cult classic in the making, grindhouse film DEAD HOOKER IN A TRUNK has finally arrived after making its UK and Australian release earlier in the year. DEAD HOOKER IN A TRUNK is being released through special midnight theatrical screenings in a limited release across the USA and Canada by IFC Midnight. Cities and theater information will be released soon. For those who can't wait to see it in theaters can see it early through VOD on August 3rd, 2011.

DEAD HOOKER IN A TRUNK, set in beautiful Vancouver, tells the story of four friends who set out on an everyday errand and end up in a fight for their lives when they discover the body of a dead hooker left in their trunk.

Lead by a sexy, impulsive Badass, her distant Geek twin sister, their bible thumping, Jesus loving Goody Two Shoes friend, and a chaotic, rock star Junkie pal, the group has to put aside their differences to dispose of the body before they're next. Thrown into their own personal purgatory, they face off against persistent police, a sleazy motel manager, chainsaw wielding triads, and a brutal serial killer. All the while they are followed by a mysterious Cowboy Pimp who wants to claim the corpse for his own.

Will they uncover the truth behind the body and be able to stand up to their demons? Buckle up and get ready for the ride of your life filled with gun fights, extreme violence, blood, guts, gore, and goats.

DEAD HOOKER IN A TRUNK is the debut feature film by Canadian Twin Filmmakers, Jen and Sylvia Soska, that has set the independent horror scene ablaze with excitement. The film and the filmmakers have captured the attention of Hostel director Eli Roth, Fangoria, Gorezone, Twitch Film, Rue Morgue, and many other profound voices in horror.

“Watching Dead Hooker in a Trunk is like having the best bare backing sex of your life while hopped up on junk with a fugly prostitute in a seedy motel room on the wrong side of town”
~ TWITCH Film

"Seriously, f*cking wow. I was totally hooked by the dialogue and the sheer where-the-f*ck-is-this-going-ness" of it all."
~ Gorezone

"A cult classic in the making and a hidden gem in indie film making."
~ The Jaded Viewer

"Wild, psychotic, funny, bloody, and strangely sexy opus."
~ Arrow In The Head

DEAD HOOKER IN A TRUNK has earned a substantial cult following and named onto several "Top Horror Film Of 2010" lists making it one of the most hyped and blogged about independent films of the year.

"Nearly every actor and actress who appeared on screen in DHiaT also served the film in other areas, from camera operators and stunt coordinators to editors and cinematographers. This film is a work of art, and it's a labor of love. Love from fans of horror, and of film in general, who took that love and put it to work, creating a film of their own. And the love and respect that these men and women have for the the genre, as well as for movies as a whole, is very evident throughout the entire film. This is how a movie is supposed to look, sound and feel!" ~ D'Ment'D Cinema

For more information, please check out the following sites or contact the Twisted Twins at their Official Site (http://www.twistedtwinsproductions.net/).

Twisted Twins Productions

IFC Midnight

Industry Works


Twisted Twins Productions is co-owned by film makers Jen and Sylvia Soska who bring you edgy dialogue, gore~geous effects, beautiful cinematography, and memorable characters, all for your viewing pleasure.

Their debut smash hit, DEAD HOOKER IN A TRUNK is only the beginning and the two are busy at work on their next project, AMERICAN MARY.

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